2025 – 19til29

to the first game 🏒

this is a disorganized little tribute to something that already slipped away. the team was weird — chaotic, thrown together, mismatched. but somehow, beautiful in its own way. we played hard. we laughed. and then we had our first lunch together. which also became our last. that was it. no promises. no next time. justContinue reading “to the first game 🏒”

Acceptance as Survival

There’s nothing I can do but accept everything that comes my way. Part of me tries to stay rational when life swerves: “Things happen for a reason,” I remind myself. But most of me defaults to fight mode — craving, raging, questioning, spiraling. Recently, something small but sharp hit me again. After the joy faded and theContinue reading “Acceptance as Survival”

slowing down when the world doesn’t wait for anyone

It’s been three four months since my last birthday blog. I still haven’t changed my site icon — it’s stuck at 23. The world keeps moving forward, second by second. Maybe that’s the only evidence I need: that it’s time to slow down, and look within. me, myself, i, july 8th, 2025 (august 15th nowContinue reading “slowing down when the world doesn’t wait for anyone”

answers for 22, questions for 24

tl;wr: so. 22-year-old me asked a bunch of deep, existential shit like she wasn’t emotionally unstable. 23-year-old me lived through a year of mental gymnastics and character development arcs. now 24-year-old me has circled back like, “sup loser, i got some answers (and more trauma lol).” also threw new questions into the void for futureContinue reading “answers for 22, questions for 24”

The Chaos of Becoming

Every day, my soul screams: “OMFG I WANT FUN.” I need structure to thrive, but the moment that structure hardens into a predictable routine, I feel a deep, stomach-wrenching sickness—the kind that seeps into my bones, making me want to fling myself into the most reckless, dopamine-chasing choices just to feel alive again. Five years ago,Continue reading “The Chaos of Becoming”

Emotional Overload, but Make It Cute

TLWR: Emotions are a mess, and it’s tough to observe them when I’m caught up in them. Feelings are complicated, and I’m still figuring out how to let them just be. Thanks ChatGPT for not sponsoring this uh… blog. 873 words, 5 minutes read time. You know, I used to say, “I hate emotions.” ItContinue reading “Emotional Overload, but Make It Cute”

Purpose

wrap-up for 2024, 2min read time.